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22 Feb

Not another politically driven post, I promise.

In this piece, I’m writing about something a bit more close to home…education.

Let me start by saying I love my job.  I love working with high school students (most of the time) and the ones among them that are trying their best and doing what they can to succeed make the dealing with the rest of them tolerable.

But by and large, we are not doing our current high school students any favors.

Check out the below cartoon.  I pulled it off the internet, and fully credit the cartoonist.

Picture says a thousand words, to be sure.

When I was in high school, if I got a bad grade on something (it happened once or twice), my parents came at me.  AT ME.  My fault, my responsibility.  All through high school (now that I think about it, things actually started operating that way when I was in the fifth grade).  It was my fault, because my teachers did their job, and my parents did their job of making sure that I had a place and the time to do homework.  If it didn’t get done, I was responsible.

Fast forward to now.  If a student is failing my class (WHICH IS INEXCUSABLE, because to pass you basically have to wear a uniform one day out of four and have your shoes on the right feet), not only do I have to address it with the student, I have to address it with the parents.  And I have to give the student every opportunity, and then one more chance, to fix the issue before I can actually fail them.   And if I do fail them, I will have to answer a litany of questions:  Did I address with the student?  Did I address with the parent?  Did I give them the opportunity to make up late work?  Did I remind them when it was due?  Did I tattoo on their forehead backwards so they could be reminded when they look in the mirror?

(Okay, maybe I made that last one up).

So, I try to play the by the rules.  I contact the parents and some of them try and help. But many of them are enablers, making excuses for their son or daughter instead of preparing them for their future.  “Oh, well, Johnny is just that way.”  Well, Johnny is just going to be unemployed; enjoy having him home eating all your food until he’s 25.

When I was younger, my parents fed me and clothed me.  But if I WANTED something, I had to earn it.  Not necessarily by going out and getting a job, but by handling my responsibilities, being where I was supposed to be, and performing in the classroom.  Some of the students I see today apparently don’t have to operate in that type of system, for I see the newest sneakers, the latest phone, no curfew, and straight D’s or worse on their report cards.

This mentality leaves the student totally unprepared for life in the outside world.  Mommy and Daddy can’t “fix” something when you have a job and you “forget” to show up on time and prepared.  You don’t get another chance, you just get fired.  We have the opportunity to teach the children those lessons in an environment where the only real consequence is a little hit to their pride and some cracks in their ego, and the collective “we” (the team of parents, teachers, and administrators) back down.

We as a society are going to reap what we sow.  There are good students, to be sure.  Industrious, conscientious young ladies and gentlemen with a great work ethic who don’t feel entitled to anything they haven’t worked for.  They keep me going.  But the sad fact is that in the future their taxes and mine are going to go to support the rest of the brats who don’t want to be accountable for anything they do or are supposed to do and are getting away with it because parents would rather blame (or sue) the school than step up to the parental plate.

Being a parent is tough, I get it.  We don’t want to see our children struggle or denied anything.  But we can’t fix everything for them; they need to struggle a bit to grow.  Before teeing off on the school, here are some questions I would like to see every parent of a failing student ask themselves:

  1. Do I hold my child accountable for their actions at home?
  2. Do I ensure that they have the time and a quiet place to study?
  3. Is there an “earn your way” mentality in my home?
  4. Does my child understand that the expectation is that they will do their best in school?
  5. Do I set boundaries in my home that can be adjusted based on the responsibility my student demonstrated?
  6. Are there consequences for NOT giving a best or respectable effort in school?
  7. What can I do to work with the teacher (instead of blaming them)

As a teacher, all I’m asking of the parents is that they hold their kid as accountable as they hold me for what happens in the classroom.  More would be unfair, but less is dangerous.

 

 

 

 

 


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